On Tuesday, The Balloon Explorers Club had the distinct pleasure and fortune
to interview the legendary and mysterious Lorenzo Von Matterhorn:
BEC: Thank you Mr. Matterhorn for agreeing to this one on one interview with us. We know your schedule can be quite demanding.
Matterhorn: I always have time for my favorite balloon explorers club.
BEC: Mr. Matterhorn, when you were a child...did you plan on being the greatest balloon explorer this world has ever seen?
Matterhorn: Yes, actually.
BEC: You are world-renown for your daring escapes and your ability to overcome the most dangerous of odds.
Can you tell us about your most death-defying escape?
Matterhorn: It was a clear, dark night and I was flying in my balloon
over the vast Amazon jungle. In a matter of moments, the sky opened up and the weather turned violent.
I saw lightning strike only a few feet from me.
I knew I had no other choice but to land the balloon in the middle of the jungle and wait it out. Well, as luck would have it,
I landed my balloon right in the middle of a hyena den. And if you know anything about hyenas,
you know that they intentionally starve themselves for days in order to feast during a full moon.
And yup, you guessed it, it was a full moon.
They formed a circle around me slowly closing in. There had to be at least 30 of them.
I reached around to my back to pull out my samurai sword, but then I thought better of it. No matter the circumstances,
I had to uphold the Matterhorn family honor to never hurt an animal. Then I had an idea.
I reached into my balloon's basket and pulled out one of my prized possessions...
a trumpet that was bequeathed to me by Louis Armstrong. I knew I had one shot. I put the trumpet to my lips and started blowing.
I don't mean to boast or anything, but the sound that came out of that horn was enchanting.
The hyenas immediately just froze where they stood, hypnotized by the music.
When I was finally done playing, the hyenas approached me with kindness in their eyes and ushered me into their den.
We enjoyed a fantastic meal of venison and they allowed me to sleep through the storm in their den.
Matterhorn: I know. Pretty amazing, stuff huh?
BEC: Sure is. Well thank you Mr. Matterhorn. You are a hero to us all.
Matterhorn: No I am not. The real heroes are the teachers who are inspiring and encouraging the future of the world.